Kill Off Change? Why Bother?
4th in a series – “How We Routinely Kill Off Change.”
We use five filters to kill off change. Thus far, I’ve shared three:
My point is that change, especially self-change usually inspires various types of filters to become active and block the way forward. All of us have been conditioned, since birth, to use these filters to avoid the discomfort of personal change. We diffuse them by noticing they are in play.
Welcome to the 4th filter: Resignation
This one begins with,
- “I’m too young, too old, too fat, too gay, too stuck, too short, too angry.”
- “I can’t take care of my own desires and needs, I have three kids to get through college.”
- “We don’t have the resources to change, so why should we bother?”
Resignation is the file cabinet that stores all of the “evidence” we have compiled to prove we cannot and will not change.
Some of us would characterize resignation as a lack of hope. But it is actually a lack of optimism, an unwillingness to believe in ourselves or that positive action will make things better. Many times, the experience of failure blossoms into a belief that we simply don’t have what it takes to pursue vision or success. Often, we present our problem as a form of bias: “These companies are only hiring young people. You know how it is when you turn sixty.” That form of resignation overlooks the fact there are scores of people in their 60s, 70s and even 80s who are making a big difference in the workplace. Resignation is the filter of giving up.
“I’ve gained so much weight the furniture is starting to rotate around me. Why bother going to the gym, they are all so perfect.”
How do we diffuse this filter? Like the others, we put filters in their rightful place when we notice them and point them out. Journaling and using exercises like Law of Attraction can be very helpful in changing this destructive internal dialogue.
Here are a few sample questions:
- What do I most want to accomplish and am struggling to attain?
- What am I putting in the way?
- If I’m playing the resignation game, what are some of my fundamental messages?
- Now, write out an alternate scenario: What you would do if you didn’t have resignation?
- In closing, what does resignation have to do with engagement? How many of us show up with conversations like, “It’s just a job?”
Tomorrow, look for the last filter and we move onto to new a whole new world.
Brought to you by David Harder, President – Inspired Work, Inc. (310) 277-4850
(C) Copyright, Inspired Work, Inc. – 2017 – (All rights reserved)